Wednesday, May 30, 2012

HE SAID, SHE SAID

True story. Names changed sort of. (No names given. You can figure it out.)

"Bunch of us are going to West Virginia next weekend to shoot the rapids. Want to come?" he said.

"Why would you want to shoot rabbits? Why would I want to shoot rabbits?" she asked.

"It'll be fun," he said.

"It'll be fun shooting rabbits?" she asked.

"Yes, it'll be a blast." He smiled at her. "Come with us; have some fun."

"Fun? And why do you have to go to West Virginia to shoot rabbits?" she said.

"Cause the rapids are bigger there."

"So, the rabbits are bigger there, in West Virginia, and it will be fun shooting them? Do the rabbits think it's fun?"

"The rapids don't care, for crying out loud. They're just rapids. Do you want to come or not?"

(This is how married people talk. . . .he said, she heard. But I digress.)

"So if I go, what should I wear? To shoot rabbits, I mean, what should I wear?"

"That's a stupid question. Wear a bathing suit. Do you want to come or not?"

"A bathing suit? What, the rabbits spray us with water?"

"Of course. They're rapids. What do you expect?"

I expect conversations to make sense.

"I never thought you would drive all those miles to shoot rabbits. Big or not, we've got rabbits around here. Some ate your tomato plants."

He looked at her as though she was crazy. She looked at him as though he was crazy. Sometimes, that's how married people look at each other.

Finally, finally, they figured out the dialogue problem. She went with him to West Virginia and almost drowned in the rapids. More on that in a later post, if you're interested.





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